


Sepulcher

by honeybunchesofgoats



Category: Free!
Genre: Abuse, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, Gen, Kidnapping, Manipulation, Minor Violence, Rape/Non-con Elements, Stockholm Syndrome
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-11-02
Updated: 2016-04-23
Packaged: 2018-02-23 21:39:50
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 12,233
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2556698
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/honeybunchesofgoats/pseuds/honeybunchesofgoats
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rin wakes up to find himself surrounded by darkness, held captive by an unknown stranger.  But he's not alone.  He has a room mate. A small, strange room mate who might be his ticket to freedom.<br/></p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Perdition

**Author's Note:**

> My first fic for Free! Here I go! Hope you all like messed up AUs cause that's my specialty.

The first time Rin woke up he couldn’t see.  His throat was dry and his tongue felt too large in his mouth.  A heavy, throbbing ache pounded through his head, leaving him unable to focus.  His body was numb and with only a slight recognition of shuffling and someone’s hands hauling him up, he slipped back into oblivion.

 

The second time Rin woke up he still couldn’t see.  The ache in his head had faded to a dull pressure that came in waves. Spikes of sharp pain stabbed through Rin’s brain when he moved his head.  He felt himself blink.  The off putting sensation of straining his eyes in the thick darkness made him dizzy.  He blinked until he couldn’t tell if his eyes were opened or closed.  (Am I blind?)  He moved his fingers against the dusty, cold floor and quickly pulled his hands into his lap suddenly aware of his surroundings and his inability to see them.  Chains rattled with his movement causing Rin to jump.  He sat on a hard floor with his back against an equally hard wall.  It was cold.  He brought his knees up to his chest and curled into himself.  He fiddled with the cuffs he discovered around his wrists and felt something quickly crawl over his bare toes (where are my shoes?) making him pull his legs closer. Soon enough his headache grew monumentally and he let unconsciousness take him once again.

 

\--

 

“Hey, wake up.”

 

_The sun was shining bright and Rin walked down the sidewalk home from practice.  The light made him squint and he wished he had remembered to bring sunglasses.  It was summer, after all.  Although, it was a pretty chilly day for summer.  Why was he so cold?  Rin pulled his towel around his shoulders and shivered.  Maybe he was catching a cold.  He turned to Sousuke. “Do I look sick to you?”_

 

“Hey.”

 

_Sousuke ran his hand over his forehead and gripped his hair, tugging a lil bit.  Pain flared up in his head. “That fuckin hurts, asshole.” Sousuke patted the side of his face harshly. “Hey, Rin, wake up.”_

 

“Rin. Wake up.”

 

Rin opened his eyes to a blinding light and a shadow hovering over him.  Touching his face.  Rin’s mind screamed at him to pull away, but his body didn’t respond.  Everything was blurry and no amount of blinking cleared it.

 

“That’s it, Rin, my good boy. Wake up.”

 

Unfamiliar voice.  Rin tried to pull away but his limbs were sluggish and the grip in his hair kept him in place.  He swallowed and realized there was a cloth gag held in place by a strip that was digging in the corners of his mouth.  His jaw hurt.

 

“Matsuoka Rin.”

 

Rin bit down on the fabric strip and bared his teeth.  Who was this man? (How does he know my name?)  He wanted to hurt this fucker.  He let out a strangled noise.

 

“Ah ah, that’s not nice, Rin.  Now, tell me, how am I supposed to trust you enough to take the gag out if you’re not going to behave?”

 

The hand holding his hair loosened and slid down to cup his cheek.  Rin pulled away, causing his vision to white out for a few seconds.  The shadow let his hand drop and stood up, taking the blinding light with him.  Flashlight. The man had a flashlight.  Rin looked around frantically trying to take in his surroundings.  He couldn’t see much. Just a dirty, cement floor and dusty stone walls.

 

“Duckling, will you fill the basin for Rin?  He needs a washing.”

 

Rin heard quick light steps come running from another part of the room, a few pauses, then water running into what sounded like a metal bin.  Rin tried to see but the circle of light only expanded about two feet around the man’s legs.  The man shined the light back on his face. Rin clamped his eyes shut in retaliation.

 

“Look at him, my baby duck, isn’t he perfect? I think this time he’ll be the one.  Do you like him?”

 

There was a pause.

 

“Yes!”

 

The “duckling’s” voice was young and breathy, panicked and desperate to agree.

 

Rin dared to peek through one eye.  The light still obscured his vision.  He waited, listening for movement. But all he could hear was the water and the sounds of his own ragged breathing through his nose.

 

“He’s got quite a nasty cut on the back of his head that I will have to stitch up.  Most of the blood you see is from that.  I’m pretty sure that’s all of his injuries but we’ll see upon further inspection in the basin.”

 

The water turned off and the man let the flashlight point back to the floor.  Rin opened his eyes wide and willed his vision to clear.

 

“Duckling, get me the sedatives.  He’s untamed and still needs our help with simple things, like bathing.  We will have to be patient with him, do you understand?”

 

“Yes!”

 

“Good boy.”

 

Rin panicked when he saw a smaller shadow appear in the ring of light.  The larger shadow turned towards him and he saw the sharp point of a needle. (Oh, hell no).  Head injury be damned, Rin rolled to all fours and scrambled away as fast as he could, only to be stopped by the abrupt yank of his chains going taut.  He stumbled, fell on his chin, and saw stars.  Fuck.

 

“See, this is why we have to keep him tied up.  He’ll learn though.  Don’t you worry, my little duckling, he’ll be perfect.”

  
Rin pulled against the cuffs, his arms stretched as far as they could go.  The metal dug into his wrists and he let out a pained grunt.  The man stepped closer and Rin’s eyes widened in fear, and in his last burst of adrenaline, he trashed as much as he could in an effort to get away.  Through the chaos he felt a prick in his arm and screamed through the cloth. No, they couldn’t put him under, he couldn’t be defenseless, he had to keep fighting.  His limbs grew heavy once again and he lolled his head to the side.  The air going through his nostrils burned.  He was vaguely aware of the hot tears falling down his face as darkness consume him for the third time.


	2. Innominate

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rin meets his room mate.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy!

The Little Duckling looked on as the new boy, Rin, struggled to get away from his Keeper.  He felt his heart lurch at the fear reflected in the other’s eyes.  He knew that feeling and it made him sick, but Rin would learn.  His Keeper promised him.

 

Once the sedatives were in Rin’s body and took effect, his Keeper unlocked the cuffs around his wrists.

 

“Duckling, help me undress him and get him in the basin.”

 

He hurried over obediently, and helped hold Rin up while his Keeper stripped Rin of his clothing.  Rin’s body was amazing! He couldn’t stop himself from staring at the muscular form.  His Keeper chuckled warmly.

 

“You like what you see, Baby Duck?”

 

The Baby Duck nodded his head enthusiastically, his gray hair falling into his eyes.  His Keeper reached out, ignoring the way his Duckling flinched, and brushed his hair off his forehead.

 

“You’re due for another trim.  I’ll trim it this time but soon he’ll be taking that task over.”

 

The Duckling stared at his Keeper with wide eyes.

 

“You won’t cut my hair anymore?”

 

The Duckling froze and slammed his hand over his mouth and clumsily stood up to bow.  He wasn’t supposed to question his Keeper so bluntly, that was rude. So, so rude.  Fortunately, his Keeper wasn’t offended and sighed, almost sadly.

 

“No, that will be Rin’s job now.”

 

The boy slowly straightened up and kept his eyes averted, nodding to show he had heard.

 

“Help me carry him to the basin.”

 

His Keeper looped his arm’s under Rin’s shoulders and the boy lifted Rin’s feet.  Like this, they carried Rin’s body to the basin, his bottom dragging across the floor.  With a huff, his Keeper lifted Rin up and over the edge and gently sat him in the water.

 

The boy stood and watched his Keeper clean and inspect Rin’s body.  He gasped when his Keeper removed the gag and revealed two rows of sharp teeth.  Rin was beautiful and scary.  He couldn’t wait to get to know him!

 

\--

 

Consciousness returned to Rin slowly.  The boy watched as he went in and out of sleep for the next hour.  This was the most excruciating, anxiety-inducing hour of his _entire_ life.  What if Rin didn’t wake up?  His Keeper assured him that Rin would be alright, but he couldn’t help his nerves from spiking every time Rin fell back asleep.

 

_He will be in pain from the stitches, but no need to worry, Duckling.  They will heal.  Be patient with him, he’ll be cranky at first, but I promise, he will be okay.  You think I would damage your new present?_

 

No, of course his Keeper wouldn’t. The boy felt silly with himself for being so nervous and shook his head with a small smile.  His Keeper loved him.  He wouldn’t hurt Rin.

 

Rin’s moments of rousing were more frequent.  The boy sighed, decided he should prepare for his awakening, pushed himself off the floor and headed towards the basin.  He propped the flashlight on the small table, one of the only pieces of furniture in the room, and reached for the drinking glass his Keeper left for him.  He turned the rusty knob on the water faucet and with a creak, water rushed out into the basin.  He let it run for a few seconds to clear the rust and filled up the glass.  The boy took out a container from under the table and peeled off the lid.  One scoop is what his Keeper told him.  A spoon waited inside the container, half buried in the powder.  He wasn’t exactly sure what the powder was, although he had added it to his own water when his Keeper had taken him in, but he knew it was a Good Thing.  His Keeper told him so.

 

_This will take the pain away and help you feel happier, my Baby Duck.  Soon you won’t need to take it, but for now, it is necessary.  Do you understand?  This will help you._

 

One scoop?  He used to have to take three scoops, twice a day.  Maybe Rin isn’t as worse off as his mind is making it out to be.  Of course, that’s got to be it.  Rin is strong.  That’s why his Keeper brought him here.  His Keeper wouldn’t settle for anything less.  His Keeper gives only the best to his Duckling.

 

The boy’s face heated up.  His Keeper loved him so much and he couldn’t be more fortunate.

 

He wasn’t sure how long he was stirring the water, mesmerized by the clinking of the spoon against the glass, when he heard a groan behind him.  He jumped at the sudden interruption.  Right. Stay focussed.

 

He shook off the spoon and put it back in the powder, closed the lid and stood up with the glass clutched in his hands.

 

“Matsuoka-senpai?”

 

He could only hear harsh breathing in return.  The boy took a few steps closer, then backtracked, remembering to grab the flashlight.

 

“Matsuoka-senpai? Are you awake?”

 

His senpai hissed and sucked in a breath.

 

“What the fuck.. my fuckin’ head…”

 

“Please don’t touch your stitches!”

 

The boy rushed over to Rin. Rin blinked slowly and looked at him confused.

 

“Wha? Who?”

 

“Please don’t touch your stitches, Matsuoka-senpai! They need to heal!”

 

“Who the fuck are you?”

 

The boy stopped.

 

“W-what?”

 

“Who are you?”

 

Panic crept into his stomach.

 

“I… I belong to my Keeper.”

 

A beat of silence.

 

“What.  No, I meant your name.”

 

His stress levels were rising. The boy took a few deep breathes to fight off the panic.  He had to keep it together, he had to aid Rin and his injury.

 

“I don’t have a name, Matsuoka-senpai! Now, please, drink this water! You just woke up and need to drink!”

 

The boy put the glass to Rin’s lips effectively cutting off any comeback Rin was sure to spit out at him.  He didn’t take the glass away until Rin had finished it, down to the last drop.  Rin gasped, trying to catch his breath.

 

“The fuck, kid.  I could have choked.”

 

He stood up and bowed deeply.

 

“I’m sorry! But you needed to drink. You are healing.”

  
Rin glared up at him and the boy felt his stomach sink.  He looked away and willed himself to stay put.  What if Rin hated him?  He didn’t want Rin to hate him!  He wanted Rin to love him.  What if is Keeper was wrong?  No, no. Stop being silly.  His Keeper knew what was good for him.  He shook his head and laughed a little to himself.  His Keeper said Rin would love him and his Keeper was always right.


	3. Heed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> *posts another chapter before I have to put up with my family for mine and my cousin's bday* *cake, here I come*

The boy said he didn't have a name.  Was the boy raised here?  Was he lying?  Who is he?

 

Rin watched the boy fidget in place.

 

“Oi. Give me the light”

 

The boy’s eyes widened and he opened his mouth as if to say something but Rin cut him off.

 

“I just want to see where I am.” And what you look like.  The boy looked unconvinced.

 

“I”ll give it right back.  Promise. I’m not trying to pull any fast ones.. I just want to see the place.”

 

Hesitantly, the boy handed him the flashlight.  Rin turned it around so the light faced outward and swept the beam along the perimeter of the room.  Stone walls.  Cement floor.  Dirt ceiling with wooden boards as makeshift beams.  There was a basin in the corner to his right with a small table next to it.  On the table was a med-kit, a towel, and underneath the table sat a lidded Tupperware container.  A pipe ran from the ceiling and stopped about a foot above the basin and had one dial.  There was another pipe from under the basin that led to a small draining grate in the cement floor.  A small container that Rin recognized as a bedpan sat against the wall. On the other side of the room was what looked like an old dog bed and a blanket.  A small toy box was next to it.  On the wall opposite him there was a ladder that lead up to a small door in the ceiling.

 

He shined the light down on himself and saw he was naked, save for a pair of loose black shorts.  Each of his wrists were cuffed to a chain, which he followed with the length with the light to find them anchored to the stone wall behind him.  The chains were about five feet long and gave him a small range of movement.

 

Finally, he aimed the light at the boy’s face.  The boy whimpered and covered his eyes, turning his head away from the beam.  The boy was small with short gray hair styled in a bowl cut.  He wore a loose tshirt and loose shorts, was barefoot, and looked malnourished.  Rin guessed his age to be around 15 years, but it was hard to judge.

 

“Open your eyes.”

 

The boy opened his eyes and turned his head towards Rin, his eyes squinted against the blinding light.  Rin lowered the glare of the flashlight to his neck.  Rin watched intently as the boy’s eyes relaxed and opened completely.  He was met with large, bright blue eyes that were topped by a pair of strong eyebrows.  The boy had a round, young looking face and a button nose.  A beauty mark accented his right eye.  Rin studied his expression.

 

Those eyes should have been expressive, but to Rin, they were clouded.  Bright blue in color, but dull in emotion.  The only expression that flashed across his features was fear.

 

Silence settled between them and Rin watched as the boy shifted and fidgeted uncomfortably under his stare.

 

“Matsuoka-senpai?  May I have the light back now?”

 

Rin didn’t waste energy on a verbal answer and extended his arm out to offer the flashlight.  The boy knelt down in front of him and placed the flashlight on it’s end so it pointed towards the ceiling, effectively illuminating their portion of the room.

 

A wave of heaviness overtook Rin and he felt his head lull to the side.

 

_Fuck, what was that?_

 

The boy leaned forward and studied his face.  His limbs felt heavy and if moved his head too fast he overcome with dizziness.  The pain in the back of his head dulled to a slight throbbing, at least.

 

“Matsuoka-senpai?”

 

“ M’not your senpai.”

 

Fuck, it was hard to move his lips.

 

_What was going on?_

 

“Uh.. Matsuoka-senpai, are you feeling okay?”

 

“I feel ...like shit.  Smells like shit in here.  Everythin’ is shit.”

 

Rin brought his hands up to his face.  He could hardly register the feeling of them against his cheeks.

 

“Matsuoka-senpai, you might feel tired but my Keeper said that was expected and that it was a good thing! So don’t worry!”

 

“What’s’yer name?”

 

“I-I told you! I don’t have a name!”

 

“So you, what.. jus’ go by “kid” or.. or something.” God, it felt like his lips moved in slow motion.

 

“Um, my Keeper calls me his Duckling or his Baby Duck. So that’s what I answer to.  My Keeper didn’t give me a name.  If he didn’t give me one then I don’t need one!”

 

The damn boy looked almost proud at that.

 

“So were you clubbed over the head and dragged here too?”

 

“W-what? Uh, I. Matsuoka-senpai, I don’t mean to be rude but I don’t want to answer any more questions!”

 

Rin groaned.

 

“Why am I here? Where are we?”

 

“Matsuoka-senpai!”

 

“Answer me, kid!”

 

The boy flinched at Rin’s outburst.

 

“You don’t need to yell at me!”

 

Rin narrowed his eyes at the boy.

 

“Really? I don’t? Because if you haven’t noticed I have been taken against my will and brought here and I want to go home. I don’t want to be here, I don’t know where I am, I don’t know what’s going to happen to me, I can’t lift my arms, and you won’t fucking answer my questions.”

 

Tears started falling from the boy’s eyes.  Rin glared.

 

“What are you crying for?”

 

The boy shook his head and rubbed his eyes.  Rin huffed.  Occasional sniffles broke the silence.

 

“Kid.”

  
The boy shook his head again and pulled his knees to his chest to hide his face.  Rin would have pushed him further but he felt heavy and slow.  He slumped back against the stone wall and let his chin fall to his chest.  He might have been drooling, but he couldn’t tell, nor did he care.  He only realized the door on the ceiling opened when the sniffling boy squeaked out in surprise.


	4. Dote

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ah, sorry it's so short. hopefully I can start moving this story along soon.

His Keeper was coming down and he would be caught crying.

 

_He can not let his Keeper see him crying._

 

The boy hurriedly wiped his eyes and hoped that there were no tear tracks left behind.  He kept his head down and stared at the floor as his Keeper’s footsteps approached.

 

“Are you hungry, Duckling?”

 

“Ye-,” his voice cracked, “Yes, I would like to eat with your permission!”

 

His Keeper chuckled with amusement and crouched down next to him.

 

_He knows._

 

“Look at me, Baby Duck.”

 

_He sounds like the cat that just caught the mouse. He knows he knows he knows._

 

The boy allowed his chin to be raised and looked at his Keeper.  He couldn’t meet his Keeper’s eyes and settled on the spot under his nose.

 

“Have you been crying?”

 

“W-what?”

 

“Don’t lie to me.  Have you been crying?”

 

He met his Keeper’s eyes and silently pleaded with him to change the subject.  The heavy stare that bore into his left no room for argument.  He bit his lip and nodded his head.

 

“Oh? And why were you crying?”

 

He didn’t know how to answer.

 

“ _Duckling_ , tell me.”

 

The boy winced.  His Keeper’s patience was dwindling.

 

“I… I made Matsuoka-senpai angry.”

 

“You made him angry?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“How did you make him angry?”

 

“I didn’t want to answer his questions because I didn’t know how! I tried to make him happy, I promise! He just ignored me a-and I didn’t know what to say! T-then he said he d-didn’t want to be here! It’s a-all my fault!”

 

His Keeper studied his face for a while.

 

“What did he do when he was angry?”

 

“W-what are you going to do to him?”

 

“Answer the question.”

 

He always had to answer questions, didn’t he?  Why couldn’t he do anything right the first time?  He always had to be told twice.

 

“He yelled at me.”

 

“What? You need to speak louder.”

 

“He yelled at me!”

 

His Keeper hummed and stood up.

 

“Stand up, Duckling.”

 

The boy stood up and went still at the shock of his Keeper pulling him into an embrace.

 

“Shhh, that’s okay, Duckling.  You’re only a baby.  Babies don’t always know how to answer questions, they’re not smart like adults, that’s why Rin got frustrated.  Adults yell at babies when they’re angry, especially when they’re crying, okay?”

 

The boy nodded his head against his Keeper’s shoulder and sniffled.

 

“Rin didn’t mean nothing of it, he’s just confused right now and doesn’t know how to take care of babies.  Soon he’ll be happy to be here, I promise.”

 

The boy curled up into his Keeper’s arms.  His Keeper knew how to make it better, knew how to make him feel safe.

 

“Now, my Baby Duck, are you hungry?”

 

“Yes, please.”

 

His Keeper sat down and the boy shifted, finding a comfortable spot in his Keeper’s lap.  Typically, he sat in front of his Keeper to be fed, but his Keeper was being kind today.  He knew his Duckling needed the extra comforting during this stressful change.  The boy sighed and rested his head against his Keeper’s chest, opening his mouth to accept the food brought to his lips.

 

“There we go, my perfect little Duckling.”

  
The boy closed his eyes and finished his hand-fed meal in comfortable silence.  He was warm and full and so happy to be in his Keeper’s safe arms.  He started to doze off to the sound of his Keeper’s heartbeat and soon enough was fast asleep.


	5. Incite

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay here's an update! writing is hard.. also happy gobble day... ate too much... see you when I wake up from my food coma

Rin tried to listen to the boy’s interactions with the kidnapper, but it was so hard to focus.  So damn hard.  Whatever that kid put in his drink was really strong shit.

The two had been quiet for a while and maybe they left or maybe it’s been hours or even days.  He couldn’t tell.

Rin sat in the darkness for what could have been a few more minutes or could have been a few more hours, but was snapped back to a more alert state when he heard footsteps approach him.

“Rin.”

There was no flashlight, just the darkness and their voice.

“Uhn.”

Dammit, he couldn’t speak.  His lips didn’t want to cooperate.

“You know you made my Duckling cry?  Now, why would you be so cruel to such an innocent baby?”

Rin heard shuffling to his left and flinched.  The kidnapper was close, too close.

“Listen, that’s not how good adults are supposed to behave.  Babies are scared, confused, dependant souls.  You have to take care of them, nurture them.”

“Fuh…. Fuck.. you  ‘n that kid.”

A sharp pain to the back of his head made him see stars and he fell forward, slumping over his knees.

“Don’t force me to break your stitches open.  We don’t _use_ that kind of language here.  Now, when my Baby Duck wakes up from his nap, I’m going to teach you exactly how you’re supposed to behave.  I’m going to teach you your role.  And you’re going to be a quick learner, I can already tell.  I only pick the best for my Duckling.”

Rin hissed at the sudden pressure in the side of his neck as something sharp, _needle needle needle_ , broke through his skin.   _Fuck_.

\--

Rin didn’t remember falling asleep or waking up, but he now found himself with the strange, nameless boy sitting in his lap.  It was hard to see in the dark, and the light was different than the usual flashlight.  The light wasn’t still, it was warm and flickering.   _Candles_.  It was a candle! Rin squinted and tried to count the little flames, but they kept multiplying and disappearing before his eyes.  The shimmering, unsteady glow hurt his head and he closed his eyes in a moment of dizziness, unable to keep his head from falling back.  Two warm, small hands appeared on the back of his neck holding the base of his head.

“Matsuoka-senpai, are you okay?”

That voice.  It was kind of nice.  Caring.  The boy cared about him.  Nice, that was nice.  The boy was nice.  Rin smiled.

“He’ll be okay, Duckling.  He’s regaining his awareness under this new state.”

That voice.  He hated it.  That voice was horrible and evil.  He didn’t want that voice talking to him or this boy.  That voice was not to be trusted.  Rin scowled and curled his arms around the boy protectively.

The hands guided his head forward until Rin felt his chin against his chest, then he felt a hand caress his face, brush his hair to the side.  He smirked and cracked an eye.

“You’re nice, ya’know.”

The boy stared at him with those bright, blue eyes.  Were they always that bright?  Were they always that captivating?

“Matsuoka-senpai?”

Rin let out a sound that was a combination of a scoff and a laugh, a rather unflattering sound, and lazily brought up a chained hand to the boy’s face.  His arm was numb and heavy and hard to control.  He ended up just grabbing the side of the boy’s head, holding onto his hair to keep his hand from slipping back down.

“Just call me Rin.”

The boy blinked at him, and Rin played with his hair, god his hair was so soft.

“Uh… Matsuo- uh, R-Rin?”

“Your eyes.”

That boy needed to stop staring at him with those eyes.  Those scared, confused eyes.  Rin wanted to wipe that expression off his face and replace it with warmth and happiness.  Rin wanted to see those eyes crease in the corners and sparkle in the candle light.  This boy…

“My eyes?”

This boy wasn’t supposed to be here.  Just like himself.  They weren’t supposed to be here, they needed to get out, they need to escape, they needed to--

“You see, Baby Duck?  He’s coming around.  I told you I only get you the best of toys.”

_Evil_.  Rin bared his teeth and pulled the boy closer to him, which happened to be by his hair.  The boy squeaked in alarm and braced his hands on Rin’s shoulders to lessen the impact.

“Rin! You’re hurting me!  That hurts!”

What happened next happened fast; a brief struggle, hands prying his fingers apart, a burst of pain throughout his head, and then darkness.

\--

When Rin woke up his mouth was dry.  Swallowing made it feel like there were wads of dry cotton in his throat, Rin discovered with a grimace.  His head throbbed and his body felt slow and he couldn’t remember anything clearly, no matter how hard he tried.  Just brief moments of memory, mostly a feeling, and Rin couldn’t piece them together to form a coherent timeline.

“Fuck.”

How much time had he lost?

“Rin?”

_Dammit, kid_.  The boy was pressed up against his right side, providing him with a considerable amount of warmth.  Rin couldn’t explain the rush of affection that overwhelmed him when he felt his hair brush against his shoulder.  Also, when did the kid start calling him by his first name?

“Water, please.

That’s all he wanted.  Just give him water.

The warmth left him as the boy stood up, and Rin had to push down the sudden loneliness that tried to overwhelm him at the loss.  There was a quiet shuffling as the boy walked through the dark, then a click, and the flashlight dimly illuminated the space.  Rin blinked a few times, trying to clear the fuzzy feeling from his head and keep track of the boy’s movements.  It seemed he couldn’t keep his eyes open, and small moments of time slipped away because he didn’t even hear the faucet, or the boy’s steps as he returned.  One minute the boy stood up, and the next, a smooth edge of a glass was being pressed to his lips and he swallowed greedily, welcoming the cool, liquid relief.  He doesn’t remember when he stopped drinking or when the boy took the glass away.  He might have blacked out again, but he wasn’t sure.

“Rin, are you hungry?”

Hungry?  When was the last time he ate?

Plastic crinkled.  A container lid was peeled back.  The smell hit him and his stomach awakened almost immediately.  Yes, he must have been hungry.

“Here,” the boy’s voice was loving and soft as he brought food to Rin’s mouth.

_Strawberries?_

It was hard to chew the small pieces of fruit but whoever had prepared the food had predetermined this set back, because Rin was able to swallow most of the pieces whole.  It didn’t seem like long before he finished eating, but the effort it took was almost as exhausting as being hungry, and although his stomach didn’t feel satisfied, he was relieved to be done.

The boy settled back into his side and the warmth slowly returned, lulling him to sleep.

“Rin?

The voice seemed far away, on the edge of his mind.

“I’m glad you’re here.”


	6. Castigate

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YOOOO THIS FIC RISES FROM THE GRAVE hello I am back for now

* * *

When Rin woke up he realized he wet himself.  And by the smell of it, it didn't seem like it was the first time this had happened.  Rin grimaced at the cold, uncomfortable feeling of his shorts and felt a wave of disgust and shame wash over him.  He didn't remember ever going to the bathroom, or feeling the urge to go, in fact, he didn't remember much about his body other than the pain in his head and the heaviness in his limbs.  The pain was returning slowly, although Rin didn't mind if it meant he was more aware of his bodily functions and motor skills.  He slid the short's waistband down, moving slowly and clumsily, until he had the garment around his thighs.  His breaths came quick, already exhausted from the small action.

"Ah, Rin?  Are you awake?"

The flashlight flicked on and Rin saw the boy sitting up in the dog bed to his left.  Rin grit his teeth and grunted, choosing to ignore the boy and get back to task at hand.

"Rin, what are you doing?"

Rin stopped and looked up, shocked to see the boy had already walked over to stand in front of him.  Fuck, he wished he were more alert.  He looked back down.

"I apparently pissed myself so I'm taking off my shorts."

"Do you need help?"

Rin glared up at the boy. "No."

The boy ducked his head and fidgeted nervously.  Rin stared at him, expecting him to go back to his bed but the boy didn't move.

"Is a little privacy too much to ask for?  Or is that not a thing you know of."

The boy gasped and then shook his head.  "I know what privacy is.  I'm sorry, Rin.  What do you want me to do?"

"Oh my god, just go away."  He didn't look back up at the boy as the boy went back to his bed, so he didn't see the tears that started to run down the boy's face.  His arms moved in slow motion as he slid the shorts down his legs, his legs basically useless, and he winced when he leaned forward, his muscles cramped and twitching.  Finally, he kicked the damp shorts off and rested against the stone wall, catching his breath and trying to ignore the wet trail his shorts left on his legs.  He didn't care that his bottom was wet and bare against the dirty floor.  Rin realized he didn't care about much, just that he wanted to go home.

The door in the ceiling opened and the Keeper made his way down.

"Ducking, are you hungry?"

"Yes!"

Rin closed his eyes and tried to shut out the room around him.

"Have you been crying?"

"...Yes."

"How come?"

"I didn't give Rin his privacy and I made him mad."

Rin didn't like the silence that followed that statement and he cracked open an eye to see the man putting down the food containers and making his way over to him.  Rin instinctively curled his legs closer to his body.

"No, wait, it was my fault!  Please don't hurt him!"

The man turned around and slapped the boy.  "Quiet, Duckling."

Rin glared as the man crouched down in front of him and raked his eyes along Rin's body, stopping at the soiled shorts in front of his feet.

"So, Rin, what went on?  What did you do that made my Baby Duck so upset?"

Rin narrowed his eyes and didn't answer.  The man nudged the shorts with his foot.  "Looks like you had an accident?  My, and I thought my Duckling was the baby.  He's at least potty trained."  Rin sneered as the man chuckled.  The man continued, "So, I hear you wanted privacy from my Duckling.  I suppose it's my fault for not making it clear to you that a request like that is unacceptable.  There is no such thing as privacy between you and my Baby Duck, do you understand?"

Rin didn't acknowledge him.

"I asked you a question, Rin."

Rin turned his head away.  The man grabbed Rin's chin and forced him to turn his head back.  He gave Rin's face a quick shake.  "Open your eyes."  Rin didn't listen.  The man slapped the side of his head.  "Open your eyes."

Rin blinked away the stars and complied, the man coming into focus.  Angry eyes met angry eyes.

"Now, you're really trying my patience, Rin.  Unfortunately for me, I can't just knock you out and be done with you this time, no.  Your training is to begin and I need you at least somewhat conscious."  The keeper turned Rin's head side to side and inspected him, lifting his eyelids and shining the light in his face.  Without his gaze leaving Rin's face he motioned for the boy to come to his side.  "Little Duck, fetch Rin a glass of water.  Two scoops this time."

The boy did as he was told and went to hand the glass to his Keeper, who laughed and ruffled the boy's hair.  The boy flinched and clutched onto the glass, almost dropping it.

"Oh, no no, Little One.  You're going to give it to him.  And Rin," the man turned back to Rin and patted the side of his cheek, "Is going to be a good boy and drink it right up for you.  I'm sure he's thirsty from all his yelling at you."

The boy stepped forward hesitantly, and with a nod of encouragement from his Keeper he knelt down beside Rin.  Rin met the boy's eyes and immediately felt guilty for his behavior when he saw blue eyes glazed over in fear, shining in the dull flashlight's glow ( _but that's not my fault_ ).  A protective feeling stirred in his gut and he knew he couldn't allow the boy to be hurt, even if he didn't _care_ about the boy, the boy was as much of a victim as Rin was.  Rin opened his mouth and let the boy feed him the drugged water.

"There we go, see?  I told you, Duckling, he's the one."

The boy beamed at the man and placed down the empty glass.  Rin stared at his own knees, lost in his inner turmoil of what he just allowed.  He drank the water without even a fight, _but the boy will get hurt if I fight_ , next time he won't give in so easily, _I don't want the man to hurt me again,_ he shouldn't have to blame himself for what the man does, _I am so weak._

"Duckling, aren't we forgetting something?"

The boy looked up at the man blankly.

"How do we reward good behavior?"

The boy blinked and then let out a quiet _oh_ when he remembered.  Rin felt a light kiss placed on his cheek and he looked up to the boy pulling away from him with a blush on his cheeks, dark red in the dim lighting.  Rin looked at the man confused, but the man only looked on.

"Rin, what did we learn?"

Rin opened his mouth, his mind not computing that he were to answer a question.  What was this, a pop quiz?

" _Rin._   What did we learn just now?"

"I..." The man raised his eyebrows at Rin.  "I... Yelling at the kid is bad."

"And?"

"And..." Oh, this was so _bullshit_ , Rin grit his teeth and continued, "Privacy between me and the kid doesn't exist?"

"Are you asking me or telling me."

Rin breathed out sharply through his nose in annoyance.  "Telling you."

"Then speak up.  None of this beating around the bush."  The man crossed his arms and looked at Rin expectantly.

Rin darted his eyes to the boy, who was staring at the ground, his shoulders caved in.  He looked back to the man.  "Don't yell at the kid and no privacy between us."

The man smiled, an ugly smug thing, and turned to the food containers he brought down.

"Now, last time I checked, I heard a Little Duckling was hungry."

Rin was left sitting alone, his head spinning, as the boy skipped off after the man.  He closed his eyes as he felt a wave of dizziness and wished for sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I might try to finish this story in the upcoming months, but I can't make any promises


	7. Apostasy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The hills are alive with the sound of disappointment  
> (updated the tags, be aware)

"Do you want to play with Rin?"

"I can play with Rin?"

"Of course, Duckling, he's for you, after all."

"Thank you!"

The circle of light cast by the flashlight in the boy's hand flew around the room as the boy threw his arms around the man's neck, making Rin dizzy and he closed his eyes and exhaled slowly.  His mouth was dry, the drugs making it feel like cotton was wadded under his tongue and in the space between his teeth and cheeks.  Moving his tongue and swallowing only made the sensation worse, so Rin opted to let his mouth hang open slightly, unable to muster the strength to keep it shut.

"Rin."

He heard the voice but otherwise made no move to react to it.  He didn't have to, hands made their way under his arms and pulled him up so that he was standing on shaking legs.  The room spun and his head lolled back as his body swayed forward, and the floor tipped and the walls bent, but the hands held him upright, strong grip bruising into the soft undersides of his biceps.  Chains clattered to ground and he caught a glimpse of the boy holding a ring of keys, and he realized his wrists were free from the shackles he'd been locked in since he was brought to this prison.

"Duckling hold the light properly so I can see."

"I'm sorry."

Rin was slightly aware of his bare feet dragging on the cement floor in a pathetic imitation of taking steps and if he weren't numbed he'd feel the skin tearing over the knuckles on his toes.  He was still naked, not given a clean pair of shorts from soiling himself earlier, and he stank of dried piss.  The man sat him against the wall near the boy's "bed" and Rin slumped to the side, his back scraping against the rough stones, not feeling it, not caring.  The light illuminated a small circle around him, and he grimaced, confused and disgusted, when he realized he was surrounded by porn.  Pages ripped out from old magazines, old posters, Polaroid photos littered the space he could see, images of girls giving head, men fucking men, close ups of plump lips and large breasts, people tied up and blindfolded.  Rin slammed his eyes shut, bile rising in his throat as his heart picked up pace, the bitter taste of fear spilling into his mouth and burning the sensitive skin.  He tried to swallow it down, but the imaginary cotton in his mouth stunted his muscle movement and he choked as the acidic liquid dribbled out the corner of his mouth, coating his dried out lips.  He clumsily wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and tried to catch his breath.

"Wha... What the fuck is this?"

The boy crawled into his vision and over the thin layers of papers to sit in front of him, the pages crinkling underneath him as he moved.

"I want to play with you!"

Rin looked around, his eyes darting side to side in an instinctual attempt to find an escape.  This scared him, he didn't want to know what the boy meant, what was going to happen to him.  _I'm supposed to be the kid's present or some creepy bullshit like that_.  Horror washed over him.

"No... N-no."  His voice was hoarse and cracked and he tried, and failed, to pull his legs closer to himself.

"Rin?"  The boy blinked at him.

"Duckling, show him how to play."

"Oh!"  The boy looked around him at the pornographic images, brushing his fingers along them until he picked on up and held it to Rin.  "This one is my favorite."

Rin stared at an image of a nude young man kneeling on the floor, his hands braced on the wall while another, older man fucked him from behind.  The image looked old and faded, from a magazine probably printed decades ago, and was stained and discolored in some spots.

"But I also like this one too."  The boy held up a photograph, one that someone took and got developed, of a girl sitting with her legs spread and pushing her chest forward, pouting and looking away from the camera.  It looked like the picture was taken in someone's house and taken quickly. Rin looked down and his breaths came in short gasps.

"When I play, I like to look at these.  They make me excited, see?"  The boy settled back on his haunches and Rin realized he was naked, his ribs casting shadows in the low light.  Rin's gaze dropped down and then quickly shifted away when he caught sight of the boy's erection, half hard and leaning against his small thigh.  "And then I play with myself.  I always love Play Time, it feels so good, especially when My Keeper gives me the Special Pill.  But now I don't have to play alone anymore!  I can't wait to show you how much fun Play Time is!"

Rin couldn't move as the boy leaned toward him and shuffled closer.  "No, wait, kid, stop--"  The boy stopped, looking uncertain.

" _Rin_."  And that was the man's voice coming from the darkness outside of the flashlight's radius.  "What did I just teach you earlier?"

_There is no privacy between me and the kid._

Rin was afraid that one of them would get hurt if he disobeyed the man, so he closed his eyes and ducked his head.

"Good boy.  Go on, Duckling, Rin's ready to play with you."

The boy hesitantly inched closer and pushed his legs apart.

"Look how big Rin is!  He's like in the pictures!"

The man chuckled.  "Not quite, but as long as you're happy, my Baby Duck."

The boy hummed and Rin held his breath, bracing himself for the worst, a mantra of _please no no no_ playing in his head.  He knew the man was evil, but this went beyond that.  He wanted to blame the boy, he wanted to push him away, but even if he was physically able to, he was too afraid of the man to do so.  He felt a growl rise up, scratching in his throat as fear was tainted with anger.  The two emotions mixed together and created a slimy residue on his insides, coating him completely until no inch of him was left clean.  How dare this be happening to him, how dare this boy be abused like so, how dare it come to this.  Why did it come to this?

"Rin, play with me, please."

"I..."   _I don't want to._  He licked his lips.  "I don't know how."

A small hand covered his own limp one, and guided it to the boy's erection.  Rin saw his vision start to swim, the light become watery and distorted from tears as he felt his fingers wrap around the boy's penis.

"It's okay, Rin, just hold it tight."

He squeezed his eyes shut, forcing tears out to slide down his face, and the boy started to hump into hand.

"This feels so much better when it's with someone!  Especially you, Rin.  Your hand is so warm!"

The boy's voice was beginning to strain, and Rin prayed to any god that existed that it meant the boy was coming close, that this could all be over.  Warm breath puffed against his chest and it made Rin feel disgusting, too warm, soiled.  He tried to breathe through his mouth, the stench of waste and body odor too strong for him, but his mouth was too dried out.  The boy started gasping, making high pitched noises that Rin would never unhear, and soon something warm and wet was dripping out of his hand and down his thigh.  He couldn't help himself and he broke down, sobbing between clenched teeth as he wiped his hand furiously on the floor until he saw streaks of blood.  It wasn't enough, he still felt dirty, he could still feel the kid's skin against his palm.

"Rin?  Rin, please stop!  You're bleeding!"

The boy's voice made him still and he faced the boy, meeting his eyes.  Rin stared at him, tears rolling down his cheeks, and the boy stared back, round, young face, flushed red with hollow blue eyes that were turning grey the longer Rin stared.  There was no life in them.

"Rin, it's okay, please stop hurting yourself."

This boy didn't deserve this.  He was a victim, Rin had to remind himself that.  _Never forget he is a victim._   Rin brought his hand to the boy's face, cupping it and smearing it with blood, as his shoulders shook and he fell forward, crying into the boy's shoulder.  Hands soothed down his hair and Rin cried harder.  There was no way to describe how he felt.  He wanted to be angry at the boy but he couldn't be, he only felt a deep, suffocating sense of despair.  Anger, piping hot and searing, was saved for the man who did this to them.

"That's enough Duckling.  Time to let Rin go."

"Did I do something wrong?"  The boy's voice was tinged with fear.  "He's... He's crying."

"He is confused, that's all.  He doesn't understand Play Time yet."

The boy slipped out of Rin's weak embrace with a soft _oh_ and Rin was being hauled up again, his feet crunching against the magazine pages, guided along into the darkness.  As metal cuffs found their way around his wrists again he heard the man say to the boy _I'll give you the Special Pill, Duckling, you can have another Play Time by yourself_ but then the world started fading and Rin welcomed the darkness.  He didn't fall asleep, but he was subdued enough that the stickiness drying on his thigh didn't faze him anymore.  Rustling and gasps reached his ears but it was as if it were being filtered through a bubble.  He knew what the boy was doing but it didn't matter, nothing could reach him, he was safe inside his own mind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> bye


	8. Parity

"Rin... Are you awake?"

The boy clutched the flashlight in his hand but didn't turn it on, in case Rin was asleep.  He wouldn't want to wake him and risk getting yelled at again.  The floor was cold and dusty as the boy felt in front of him, crawling slowly towards the wall Rin was chained to, holding his breath in an attempt to be quiet.  His Keeper had gone upstairs after the boy finished his second Play Time and put the pornography back away in his toy box.  He couldn't understand why Rin didn't enjoy playing with him; Play Time always left the boy sleepy and happy, content to curl up on his bed, his muscles relaxed and bones like jelly.  He knew his curiosity and childishness angered His Keeper, and he was always, _always_ , reprimanding him for not being able to lay still, but he couldn't help himself, he _had_ to make sure Rin was okay.

"Rin?"

Silence. And then, "Yeah?"

Relief and excitement flooded through the boy.  Rin was awake!  "I'm going to turn the light on, okay?"

Rin let out a small noise that the boy took as an acknowledgment, which prompted him to click on the flashlight, making sure to point it away from Rin's face.  Rin was laying on his side with his knees curled up to his chest, his arms tucked between himself and his legs.  The chains rested over his side.  The boy noticed Rin's eyes were half closed and a shiver wracked his body in small waves.

"Are you cold?"

Rin gave him the courtesy of an answer, nodding his head slightly, his hair dragging along the floor.  Rin was looking pretty rough, like he wasn't happy at all, and that was no good.  The boy's stomach churned at the idea of Rin never being happy, never loving him.  His Keeper _promised_ , right?  He inwardly scolded himself for having doubts.  He shouldn't have such little faith in His Keeper, even if he didn't voice them out loud.  Such thoughts were poison, they would make him unhappy.

The boy had an idea.  "How about we share my bed?"  Rin didn't answer, didn't even flick his eyes in his direction.  However, the boy was undeterred as he dragged his cushion over and placed it in front of Rin.  "Here,  lay on this, it's better than the floor."  Rin didn't respond.  The boy frowned and rubbed the back of his head, unsure of what to do.  Usually Rin reacted, even if they were negative reactions, but this silence unsettled the boy.  He sat down on the cushion, leaning forward to inspect Rin.  His breathing was shallow and when the boy pulled up an eyelid, he was met with a pupil blown shockingly large.  The boy bit his lip, worried that Rin might be sick.  He gently pulled at Rin's knees until he had Rin's cooperation and he started to uncurl his body.

"There."  The boy scooted over and made room for Rin, still gently coaxing him to move.  "Just shift over a little..." Finally, Rin shuffled over with a rattling of chains and then closed his eyes.  The boy pushed Rin's hair off his forehead, hair that was beginning to get tangled and dirty, and looked down at him in awe.  Rin was truly, absolutely perfect in every way imaginable.  He slid his hand down the side of Rin's face, gently running his fingers along the bone structure, tracing Rin's smooth cheek, his sharp jaw, the soft flesh of his neck.  He took his hand away, suddenly shy, and he laid down with his back to Rin and flushed himself along Rin's chest.  They were both still nude, and at first their skin on skin contact was cold and slightly uncomfortable, but soon they began to warm up, and the boy couldn't stop the smile from breaking across his face when Rin shifted closer and draped an arm over him to hold him tight.

"Is this better?"

Rin's breaths tickled the back of his neck and made him feel a lot warmer than he actually was.  "Yeah.  Thanks."

The boy's chest swelled and he squeezed his eyes shut, reining in his emotions.  "I'm... I'm sorry for making you cry.  I didn't want you to cry.  Play Time is fun, you'll see next time."

Rin's body stiffened behind him.  "I... I don't want to play next time."

"Did I do something wrong?"  Shame and disgust crept up the boy's spine, burning the skin that touched Rin's.  Of course Rin didn't want to play with him.  Why would Rin want to play with such a stupid, worthless baby who couldn't do _anything_ right?  He couldn't stop the tears from falling if he wanted to, and soon his shoulders shook and he was trying to hide his hiccups and cries behind his hands.

"Hey... Kid?"

The boy pressed his hands harder against his lips and focused on controlling his breathing.  It didn't work.

"Hey, kid. Don't cry, I'm sorry.  I didn't mean to upset you just please stop crying."

Warm, shaky hands soothed over his arm, down his side and back up again.  Rin was _comforting_ him.  His Keeper was right, Rin _would_ help the Scaries and Loneliness go away.  The boy turned over so he was facing Rin and snuggled in close.   In the low light the boy could see Rin's eyes, dark and over dilated, glossed over and shining.  The boy tilted his head up and planted a quick kiss to Rin's chin then with a sigh, he rested his head back on the cushion and turned off the flashlight.  Rin was finally learning how to make him feel better.  Happier.  Safer.  His Keeper would be so proud of them.

* * *

 

Rin was barely aware of the light being shined in his face.

"Is he okay?"

"He's fine, Duckling.  He needs some food, that's all."

"But he's not moving!"

"Did you hear what I just said?"

"Yes."

Hands pushed him over and his body didn't protest, allowing itself to be rolled and shaped as if it were putty.  Rin didn't care, no, he didn't want to feel anything anymore.  And that included being in control of his own body.  It was too much, too hard.  His head hurt and he felt like he was stuffed with dried leaves, sewn up poorly like a sick, dilapidated teddy bear.  No one was coming for him, no one would find him locked away in this hellish prison.  He had been abducted into a perpetual nightmare and until he could figure out a way to wake up from it, he had no energy to spare.  For the first time, he started to entertain thoughts of being stuck in here forever, never seeing his family again, never seeing the _sun_ again.  And that scared him.  That those thoughts could slide their way into his brain and taint his head, his spirit, was scarier than the thoughts themselves.

Rin had always thought the mind was a powerful tool, a tool that could get him through anything life threw at him.  And he was right, it _was_ a powerful tool, but never before had it turned against him.  He was becoming his own worst enemy.

"Here."

Fingers forced his mouth open and warm liquid poured inside, making him choke on the bland, somewhat salty broth.  He was making a mess on himself, but it didn't faze him.  What the hell did he care if he spit up on himself?  It's not like he was going anywhere special anytime soon.

"Get me the bandages, Little One.  Can't have his scraped hand getting infected.  Then how will he take care of you?"

 _Take care of him_.  Right, there was the boy.  The boy who claimed he didn't have a name, the boy who has been here much longer than Rin has.  The boy who had family and friends looking for him, missing him, mourning him.  And Rin realized all his previous thoughts had one point gone through the boy's head until it was too much, until his head emptied out because it was _easier_.  How much longer would it be before that happened to Rin?

No matter how strong the pessimism gripped him, squeezing it's icy, sharp claws into the soft flesh of his brain, Rin would not give in to such weakness.  Fuck the constant pounding in his skull, the pain trying to burst through the stitches on the back of his head, to tear them open and rip his skin apart, rip it clean off his body so that he was rendered a pile of broken bones and useless meat.

Unidentifiable, nameless.  Defenseless.

No, fuck that.  He would not allow himself to be broken down and strung up like a puppet.  All thoughts of hopelessness, desperation, giving in could kiss his ass.  He would never surrender.  The broth running down his throat tasted fresher, clearer.  Rin could _feel_ it pooling in his empty stomach.  Bandages wrapped around his hand, a kiss placed on his cheek.

Rin and the boy would escape.  If it was the last thing Rin and the boy did.


	9. Renunciation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't even know what I'm doing

"The bar of soap is in the med-kit.  Fill the basin with two inches of water, no more, and be sure to let it sit until room temperature before you bathe him.  It might be helpful to close the vents so My Duckling doesn't catch a cold."

Rin hadn't noticed the two small vents along the floor behind the metal basin.  Of course there had to be vents or else he and the kid would have suffocated in this prison within the first week ( _How long have I been here?)_.  Details disappeared in the dark.

"When you're finished bathing him, drain the water and dry him with the towel.  Dry him thoroughly before you reopen the vents.  And before you dress him, make sure his clothing is clean.  He only has one shirt and one pair of shorts, so it shouldn't be difficult to wash and rinse them if need be.  It's waiting for them to dry which gets My Duckling impatient.  But now that you're here, I'm sure he won't mind stealing warmth from you.  He's awfully willing to cuddle after bath time, like most babies are."

Rin was quiet as he tried to focus on the words coming out of the man's mouth.  They were simple enough instructions, but whatever they kept putting in his drink really fucked him up.  He licked his lips in preparation to speak.

"Ha... How'm.  How am I suppose' to do all this if I'm chained up."

"My, someone's thinking ahead.  I or My Little One will unlock you so you can complete your tasks.  I trust you will behave and allow him to lock you back up.  If you put up a fight for him, I promise, you will wish you hadn't.  It's best to not even attempt.  Understand?"

Forming words was not going to happen again so Rin settled on a mumbled noise, hoping it would sound enough like a confirmation.  Luckily, the man seemed to accept the answer.

"That will be one of your duties in caring for My Baby Duck.  Another is to make sure he's happy.  He doesn't know how to take care of himself, he's dependant on me.  And now you, too.   He was becoming awfully upset and withdrawn, going through extreme separation anxiety when I had to leave.  That's why I gave you to him.  It puts my mind at ease knowing he's being taken care of and isn't lonely while I can't be here.  We follow a routine and I expect you to maintain it, or else you'll distress My Little One.  He's fragile and now the center of your world.  Everything you live for revolves around him."

The boy stood behind the man with his head bowed.  Rin swallowed in a piss poor attempt to wet his mouth.  "How the hell do I know what'll make 'im happy... What're we supposed to even _do_ down here there's--"

His head was thrown to the side and the impact of the man's palm left his ears ringing.

"This is where you and My Duckling live.  There are _no other places._   There is _nowhere else you can go._   You will make My Little One happy by being an adult and taking care of him.  Haven't you ever talked to a baby, Rin?  They're so simple.  Easy to distract and entertain.  You exist now only to serve him.  But he doesn't know what he desires, so you make those choices for him.  But," the man grabbed Rin's chin and continued through grit teeth, "So help me god if you make just _one_ wrong choice or start to taint My Baby Duck's head with your rebellious bullshit, you will wish you were never born."

The man stared into Rin's eyes and Rin blinked back, the threat catching up to him.  The man was calm and his eyes were clear and that was the most unsettling.  Rin wished the man at least _looked_ insane so then he'd have some sort of explanation, a reason the man was doing this.  But no, the man wasn't crazy, the man was in control.  He knew exactly what he wanted and how to get it.  Rin was left with no other option but to agree.  He nodded, or tried to nod, his head held tight in the man's grip.

"Good Boy."

The man let his chin go and then the boy was there, placing a small kiss to Rin's cheek.  The boy looked to the man, wide eyed and hopeful, begging for approval.

"Duckling."  The man snapped and pointed to the spot next to him, and the boy obeyed, taking his place at the man's side.  He looked up nervously at the man but the man paid the boy no attention, he was too preoccupied with watching Rin thoughtfully.

Being under the man's gaze was like having smoke, bitter and sharp, sneak its way around his shoulders, slowly crawling along his skin.  Each unwanted caress climbed higher and higher up his neck, until it suffocated, until it surrounded, until it rendered him incapable of movement.

"You will not talk to my Duckling about imaginary places, or imaginary people. You will not talk about the place you came from, because that place isn't real.  Your name is Matsuoka Rin because that's what I named you."

"No--" Rin's head was yet again thrown to the side, his neck muscles twinging in sharp pain.

"Then how exactly did you get your name?"

"My pare--"

_Smack._

"We don't talk about imaginary people, Rin."

"They're not--"

_Smack._

Rin saw stars and started to drool.

"The only person who matters, the only person who exists in your world, omitting me, is My Baby Duck.  Now repeat what you learned back to me."

Rin's chest heaved with labored breaths and it was so tempting to just close his eyes and slip away, slip away from this man, this reality.  But he couldn't give in, couldn't give up.  He straightened his head up and squeezed his eyes shut and pictured his mom and his sister.  He pictured Sousuke and Haru and the warm sand on the beach.

"The kid is the only person who exists."

"And?"

Rin opened his mouth and then shut it.  The man raised an eyebrow.  " _And?_ "

"And..." The words refused to form, every part of his being screaming to never say such a thing out loud.  "And..."  Rin swallowed.  "And I... My... name.  You."

"I?"

Rin let his vision blur and pretended he was an actor, an actor in a movie that was playing a horrible, horrible role.  None of this was real, nothing he was forced to say was real.  They were just lines.  "You gave me my name."  He receded into himself, tucking his real self deep inside, safely locked up where the man couldn't touch it.  His parents named him Matsuoka Rin and nothing would ever change that.

_My parents named me Rin and my sister's name is Gou.  I have a mom, and a dad who passed away when I was younger._

The man hummed and then snapped his fingers.  Another kiss was placed to his cheek.

"I'll be the one who feeds My Ducking.  That is the only responsibility you will never have."

Rin nodded absently.

"Good.  Now, you smell like piss. Go wash up."

* * *

The boy watched His Keeper unlock the cuffs around Rin's wrists.  Rin didn't move.  Anxiety bubbled up in his stomach.  What if Rin stopped listening?  What if he became unresponsive and unreachable like the ones before him and had to be taken away?  The boy already loved Rin too much, he didn't know if he would be able to deal with the loss.

"Duckling, guide Rin to the basin before I have to take action."

The boy nodded and quickly knelt by Rin's side.

"Rin?  Come with me now, please."

He held onto Rin's hand and gave a light tug.  Rin slowly turned his head to face him and blinked slowly.

"What?"

"Um," the boy swallowed, "We're going to the basin now.  You have to wash up."  The boy looked nervously to His Keeper, afraid of upsetting him. However, His Keeper watched on, passively.

Rin moved, shifting slightly.  "I... I can't get up."

"Crawl."

The boy jumped at His Keeper's demand, but Rin had no reaction.

"Rin... Please. Come with me now."

Rin took a deep breath and then braced his hands on the floor.  The boy helped to lift his hips and position him onto his knees and soon enough, Rin was slowly but surely crawling where he led him.  By the time they made it to the basin, Rin was out of breath and closing his eyes a lot.  That scared the boy.  Rin seemed really sick.

"Rin, can you get in the basin?" His voice wavered.

"I dunno."

Footsteps approached and then hands were under his arms, lifting the boy and moving him roughly out of the way.  The boy stumbled back, tripping over his own feet, but otherwise stayed upright and tried to make himself small, so that he wouldn't get in His Keeper's way again.  He watched His Keeper lift Rin up and over the edge of the basin with a small grunt.

"We don't have all day for My Little One to dote on you.  Wash yourself.  If you can't handle that then how are you supposed to take care of My Duckling?"

Rin reached for the water dial  and turned it, wincing when cold water spurted out over his head.  He shakily ran his hands through his tangled hair, trying to wet it as quickly as possible, but the boy could tell that Rin was struggling.  His movements were sluggish to begin with, never mind now with the cold water locking his muscles up.  Rin turned the water off and sat there shivering before he seemed to remember what he was doing and leaned over the side of the basin and reached for the med kit.  It was painful to watch, so the boy averted his eyes as Rin slipped and fell awkwardly into the side of the basin, hissing in pain.  Eventually, he reached the med kit and took the soap out.  The boy watched as Rin soaped himself up and rinsed himself quickly off.  His Keeper pulled Rin out of the basin and placed him on the floor.

"Go back to your wall."

A wet trail was left behind as Rin crawled, slowly and shakily.  His Keeper crouched down and grabbed Rin's wrists to lock into the cuffs.

"Stop fucking shaking, it's pathetic."  His Keeper threw Rin's locked hands into his lap and stood to turn to the boy.  "You.  Don't just stand there like an idiot.  Go lay down."

His Keeper's words punched him in the gut, but he could tell that His Keeper was in a bad mood.  So he ducked his head and obeyed, scurrying to his small bed to take a nap like His Keeper wanted him to.  He laid quietly as His Keeper put away the med kit, mumbling under his breath.  When His Keeper climbed the ladder and disappeared through the trapdoor, the boy allowed himself to sit up, even though he knew it was disobeying an order.

"Rin?"

The boy crawled to the basin, feeling in the dark for the flashlight.  It took him a few minutes to find it, and once he clicked it on he was able to find the towel on the side table.  He took it and walked over to Rin, draping it around his shoulders and rubbing it along Rin's arms.  He dried Rin off, carefully patting his hair down, apologizing when he accidentally brushed Rin's stitches.  The boy enjoyed drying Rin, it made him feel needed, it made him feel important, it made him feel accomplished.  For the first time, the boy felt like he could truly smile.  He finished the job in silence, satisfied to see that Rin wasn't shivering anymore, and then draped the towel over the basin's edge to air dry.

"Kid."

The boy turned around, excited Rin called to him.  "Yes, Rin?"

"Wanna know a secret?"

The boy tilted his head.  "A secret?"

"Yeah, a secret."

"Um, okay."

The boy walked over and sat down in front of Rin.

"You can't let anyone know, not even the man who keeps you here.  That's why it's a secret, okay?"

"I... I don't... I don't know."  His Keeper had _just_ warned Rin about tainting his head, and telling him something to keep secret from His Keeper sounded awfully like Rin was about to disobey that rule.  "I don't know if I want to hear the secret."

Rin scoffed.  "Of course you dont. _Babies are stupid and can't make their own decisions_." Rin's tone grew mocking and the boy frowned.  "So I'm making decisions for you, right?"

The boy nodded, although he still wasn't too comfortable.

"Right, then you want to hear my secret."

"...Okay, then.  I would like to hear your secret."

"And you won't tell the man."

The boy paused.  "I promise I won't tell My Keeper."

Rin smiled, and the boy knew he gave the proper answer because that smile was one of the most beautiful things he's ever seen.  Rin beckoned him closer.  The boy leaned in so that their faces were inches apart.

"I'm a swimmer," Rin's voice was a whisper, hot breath tickling the boy's skin, "I swim butterfly on my high school's team.  This was my last year and my last chance to form the perfect relay team, but now I won't be able to."

A swimmer?  What did Rin mean?  "You swim?  Where?"

"In a pool.  At my high school."

"High school?"

"Yeah, it's a place kids go to every day for an education.  Did you ever go to a school?"

The boy blinked at Rin in awe. Kids?  What kids?  "No, I've never heard of a school!  Is that where you came from?"

"What?"

"Well," the boy furrowed his brow, "My Keeper found you from _somewhere_ , right?" Now that the boy thought about it, where _did_ His Keeper find Rin?  There was only this room, and Away, which is where His Keeper had to go when he left through the door in the ceiling.

"No, I lived with my mom and sister.  In my house.  I would go to school during the day."

This was so confusing!  "Your... Mom?  You have a mom?  And a sister?  And a house?"

"Of course I have a mom!  Everyone has a mom!"

"That's a lie!  My Keeper named you, so you can't have a mom!"

"Kid... I'll let you in on another secret.  That's a lie.  My mom named me Rin.  When she gave birth to me."

"Well... then prove it! Where is she?"  The boy vaguely remembered His Keeper using this logic on him a long time ago, although the memories were blurry and jumbled.  It made the boy uncomfortable and confused.  If Rin couldn't prove he had a mom, then he didn't have a mom.  It was indisputable logic.  And that made the boy feel better.

"Prove it?!  How can I prove it if I'm locked up in here?!"

"See, you _can't_ prove it!" The boy covered his ears and closed his eyes. "I don't want to hear anymore secrets!"

Rin sighed.  "Fuck, my head hurts too much for this right now.  Listen, kid, just forget I said anything, okay?  I wanted to tell you that I was a swimmer because I'm proud of it and I didn't want to forget.  But it doesn't matter... It doesn't fucking matter.  It's not like anything matters if I'm stuck here and the worlds is moving on without me.  And you don't fucking understand, and it's not your fault, but why would I ever think you _would..._ "

"Rin, please..."  The boy didn't like hearing Rin so dejected and upset, especially when he kept saying that being _here_ was the cause of his despair.  Perhaps it was because he was so desperate to see Rin smile again, perhaps it was to cover up his embarrassment from falsely thinking he could feel _worth something_ by being around Rin, but the boy let the next words fall out of his lips.

"Tell me what it's like to be a swimmer."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for reading!


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